What are you, an asshole?

What are you, an asshole? We all have a little asshole inside of us.

This particular asshole was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease in 2007, and enjoys a myriad of things such as video games, writing, tv shows, and being a turd in the world's sandbox.

Reblogged from finalfantasythings

finalfantasythings:

Over the past weekend at San Diego Comic Con, Square Enix made these a free bonus on purchases above $19.99 on their online store, but this promotion is now over. During the convention they were also giving them out to people who registered a Square Enix Members account, and thanks to having more than a few sock email accounts to register, I was able to snag a few extras!

That said, I’m giving out not one, but two, but THREE!!! lanyards out, so this means that three people have chances of winning! These lanyards feature 16-bit sprites of characters from the first 13 Final Fantasy games, including (in order):

A moogle, Warrior, White Mage, Black Mage, Maria, Onion Knight, Kain Highwind, Cecil Harvey, Cid Pollendina, Gilgamesh, Bartz Klauser, Kefka Palazzo, Terra Brandford, Cloud Strife, Sephiroth, Aerith Gainsborough, Squall Leonhart, Laguna Loire, Zidane Tribal, Eiko Carol, Tidus, Seymour Guado, Shantotto, Penelo, Lightning, a chocobo

RULES/TERMS AND CONDITIONS
  • There will be three winners, all of whom will be chosen through a random number generator.
  • Everyone has a maximum of two shots through liking and reblogging this post once. Those who reblog multiple times will be disqualified.
  • Please do not try to increase your chances by using any hoarded URLs you may have! >8[
  • Following this blog is not required to participate, nor does it increase one’s chances of winning. It is, however, very much appreciated. :]
  • Yes, I ship internationally if the winner is outside of the United States, and all shipping costs will be covered by me!
  • The deadline will be August 31, 2014 at 12:00 AM Pacific Daylight Savings Time, so be sure to like and reblog before then!
  • KEEP IN MIND that Final Fantasy Things is a linked account to my personal blog, so the winner will receive an ask/submission from me as joshawooott.tumblr.com.
  • If the winner does not reply back to me within 24 hours of my personal notification, or ask/submission box are not activated, I will unfortunately have to choose another winner and that’s no fun. D:

Any other questions concerning this I will be glad to answer and clarify! In the meantime, good luck and keep calm and cast Ultima. :]

Final Fantasy Things is in no way affiliated with Square Enix Co., Ltd., is profiting in no way from this giveaway, and claims no ownership or affiliation to Square Enix or the Final Fantasy brand.

Without fail, five minutes into every episode of Catfish I whisper to myself “it’s Angela” regardless of what’s actually going on with the plot.

Reblogged from ruinedchildhood

telapathetic:

  hi:

rebuy:

imagine someone shouting your url at you across the street.. 

it happened like 3 times today :/

image

Welp. :|

My phone wallpapers right now. Breaking Bad, I just can’t quit you!

"This is Nev. I have a show with MTV"

vs

"I’m Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC"

…must be equally terrifying when on the receiving end

Sam loves to flaunt his undies in this episode and it’s fabulous.

Sometimes I wonder who I’d be if I never got sick.

Reblogged from crohnschronicals

File this under the “shit you don’t say, but think about all the time” category.

(Source: spookicolon)

This is why I don’t read the newspaper

Okay, so I’m a maybe-somewhat writer during my free time and I can understand why someone would want to use humor to better engage their audience, especially when the topic is of a serious matter, but still—

Summary: a woman suffering from rheumatoid arthritis has jumped from Enbrel, to Humira, and now is going to try Remicade.

See? Serious stuff. Except instead of focusing on what Remicade actually is and its risks/benefits/etc, this woman spends half a page making jokes about the whole coming-from-a-mouse-protein thing.

No, really. Like, “honey, we’d better stock up on some cheese harhar”. Maybe I have an unpopular opinion here and need to lighten up but Remicade is a serious drug, one I’ve been on since I was 17 or 18 and I’d never make a tasteless joke about that. Mouse, dog, cat—I don’t care if it comes from a fucking seahorse because it’s the only thing keeping me from curling up in a ball crying all day.

I just—ugh. I’m not even offended that easily, but I’m 22 and this is a grown woman we’re talking about.

And that’s what I have to say about that.

I’m not too crazy about the ER

Mostly because the doctor’s always too lazy to read your file, and would rather lean against the counter nonchalantly while you recap the past 6 years of your medical history.

It took so long that part of me wanted to start creating random, made-up words just to make sure he was still listening.

Sometimes the Internet is mean…

Take for example when you’re looking up side effects of a medicine you’re on. Y’know just the MINOR ones, that’s all you want to know about.

But Internet does not care about your feelings!

  • this cancer
  • that cancer
  • also this form of this cancer
  • this rare form of (yet, somehow you still fit the criteria) cancer

                                    

astrophil11:

I adore this key chain, but I would like to have this in a sticker.  A large, easily visible sticker on my back window for every police officer to see. 

I’m trying to get a hold of myself because this shouldn’t be funny BUT IT IS.

Reblogged from crohnschronicals

astrophil11:

I adore this key chain, but I would like to have this in a sticker.  A large, easily visible sticker on my back window for every police officer to see. 

I’m trying to get a hold of myself because this shouldn’t be funny BUT IT IS.

HMMM…

So about that Skyn condom commercial…The one where the girl’s all: “I LOVE sex and I DON’T like condoms.”

Right, well. I’m pretty sure I’ve only seen it on MTV…

OH, COME ON.

I CAN’T BE THE ONLY ONE WHO THOUGHT OF CHER FROM SWEET SIXTEEN.

That’s really nice, Dad.

"Yeah, I’ve just been busy trying to keep up with stuff around here."

"Well I don’t want you coming up if you’re stressed and shit."

badtvblog:

Via

One of the reasons I could never be on TV. At my high school graduation, several people actually LUNGED toward me as I started to wobble down the stairs. For the record, I didn’t fall. So they looked stupid, not me. :D

Reblogged from badtvblog

badtvblog:

Via

One of the reasons I could never be on TV. At my high school graduation, several people actually LUNGED toward me as I started to wobble down the stairs. For the record, I didn’t fall. So they looked stupid, not me. :D

"I liked you better ten minutes ago."

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